the girls, they love to see you shoot.

this was an especially depressing weekend here in seattle.

from everything i can tell, the shooter was a well-armed outcast with few to little ties to the party scene. i'm guessing that he intended to carry out his violence at the party, but couldn't get his nerve up. then, after hanging out at an afterparty, he decides that "now" is the time, and he ruthlessly cut down six people and himself.

i suppose that it could have happened anywhere, just as easily at a sonics game or an a.a. meeting or a post office. i suppose that since i once had ties to the rave scene, it's a bit more of a drag that it had to be tied to a party, but it would be just as sad if it happened at a gym, cafeteria or office. all age events have enough trouble here in seattle, and this will make it even worse, but i don't feel bad for raves, i feel bad for those dead folk's families.

i've been thinking a lot about gun control. i used to think that guns were pretty much useless to the average citizen... the notion of using one in self-defense is odd to me, because the overwhelming majority of people who are shot get that way long before they realize their attacker has a gun. one person with a gun usually means innocent people get shot. two people with guns usually means that twice as many bullets in the air, and if you catch one, it doesn't really matter if you were on the side of good or evil, you've still got a hole in you. i think americans think that "guns for safety" will play out like a movie, where good can out-draw evil. as said before, most people wind up shot long before they can fetch their weapon out of their purse, car, safe, closet, or from under the bed.

on the other hand, i never thought that the government, and it's effect on social differences and politics, would bring us to where we are now. who could have thought that things could get so bad, so fast? how much worse can they get? honestly, it's not too difficult for me to imagine an imminent war between the haves and have nots. i can visualize a "pre-emptive, first strike" government declaring the right to invade my home, or an entire community for that matter, with the intention of arresting or detaining me simply because i am vocal against them. it's not unimaginable to see a revolution in our time. for that reason, i completely defend the right of the average citizen to arm and defend themselves.

and this is where i'm conflicted, because i don't believe that a glock and a 12 gauge will do any good against a police state or martial law military. in fact, the simple act of using them to defend myself against those would certainly, without question, guarantee my death. i see no reason for the average citizen to own a grenade launcher, but sheesh... me and my neighbors and some deer rifles vs. the other side of a culture/class/civil war? what's the point? and how much to i want to think (or in this day and age, talk) about these fears short of joining a militia, sending up flags in the spy division of our government, or just making myself sick with a fear of everything bad coming to a head?

gun control. my dad always says "you can't put the poop back in the horse". we got tons of guns floating around in this country, and there's just no way we're just going to come to our senses and melt every last one of them down. it's sad that that sick, stupid fuck had to go and get himself an assload of them to load into his truck to go and use on a bunch of otherwise innocent and ignorant ravers. it's sad that every pissant powder dealer keeps one near to keep the competition in check. it's sad that there are enough of them floating around that little kids find them in nightstands and accidently shoot themselves or others. it's sad that sawed-off little shits walk around at night with them tucked into their waistbands, secretly hoping that someone pops off to them so they can pull that shit out and make the world grovel at their feet. it's sad that folks like me see our country spinning so far out of control that they get one just to even the playing field against the cops and the policy enforcers. it's sad that people live in so much fear and helplessness that they actually consider buying one just to defend themselves from all the other scared and helpless people who already have one. but what can you do?

australia sounds nice.